By Jack Palos at January 16 2020 18:14:26
Information around target customers is not based in empirical fact, more observational opinion. Competitor Analysis is obsolete and doesn't track minor competitors or industry trends that could present opportunities. The business strategy doesn't intuitively line up with the financial projections of the business. Financial anomalies are frequent. The level of analysis in the financial section is low. Elevator analysis (only observational comments) is a glaring sign that no detailed analysis has been undertaken. The language style in the business proposal is inconsistent and in different tenses. The structure of the business proposal in terms of the content lay out does not flow intuitively. Think trying to fit a square peg into a circle! The proposal doesn't make a definite conclusion or sound argument to invest (or lend). The lack of analysis leads to inadequate risk mitigation leaving many questions unasnwered.
If you're in the business of sports, the odds are that you are perpetually seeking new clients. In days past, you could get by with a phone book listing, maybe a newspaper ad, and word_of_mouth recommendations. Those days are long gone. These days, the competition is fierce. Whether you are opening a new franchise, recommending an employee health program, starting a youth sports program, or engaged in adventure tourism, you need to know how to write a proposal to pitch your idea or services.
Next, add topic pages that show you understand the needs of your client or the program. Depending on how large the proposed scope of work is, you may or may not need to precede the detailed pages with a brief summary. This summary section (often just a page or two) is normally called an Executive Summary for corporate clients, or a Client Summary for a less formal project. Now, proceed to describe the specific prospective client's requirements, goals, and desires. This is not yet the place where you talk about yourself. This section is all about the client or community to be served (such as when asking for funding for a community project). Use templates such as Needs Assessment, Goals and Objectives, Benefits, and Community.
There are many very good examples of sample business proposals on the Internet, but there are also some scarily bad examples being held up as first class efforts. Having spent the last 20 years as a professional banker and investor I can say this with some degree of confidence. The bottom line is that even if you do manage to stumble upon a great example it won't be relevant to your unique business or the market dynamics that pertain to your business idea. The parties who will assess your proposal and decide whether to invest are generally well trained and experienced. They read hundreds of these documents every month and can spot a copy and paste job a mile a way.